877-632-9123Boys Town Highlights: Pet Loss Grief Is Real and Many People Suffer in Silence
Losing a pet can be as painful as losing a friend or family member. Boys Town psychologist shares what families can do to cope and support each other.
Boys Town, Neb. (Feb. 17, 2026) — When a beloved pet dies, many people are surprised by how intense grief feels. The sadness, waves of emotion, disrupted sleep, and quiet moments that suddenly feel too quiet. For countless families, pets are not just animals. They are daily companions, sources of comfort, and part of the family.
Yet pet loss is still one of the most common forms of grief that people feel pressured not to talk about.
“Grief is when you lose an important part of your life, whether it is a relationship, a job, or a pet,” said Dr. Christopher Blank, licensed psychologist at Boys Town Behavioral Health Center. “For many children and families, a pet is someone they have seen every day for years, sometimes a decade or more. People form strong bonds with their pets, and we know how helpful they can be for our mental and physical health.”
Why it can hurt so much
Pets are built into everyday life. Morning routines, walks, feeding times, and steady companionship. When a pet is gone, those routines stop, but the reminders remain.
“After a pet dies, the house can feel empty,” Dr. Blank said. “The leash is still hanging on the wall. The water bowl is not being filled. Those concrete reminders can make the loss feel constant.”
Grief can also feel heavier when others minimize the loss. This is sometimes called disenfranchised grief, when a person’s grief is not socially acknowledged or understood.
“For some people, pets may be viewed as simply animals,” Dr. Blank said. “But for their owners, they can feel like very real parts of the family.”
What grief can look like
Everyone grieves differently and on their own timeline, but common responses can include changes in sleep or appetite, crying spells, withdrawing from others, avoiding reminders, loss of interest or motivation, and internal experiences like sadness, numbness, emotional pain, and persistent thoughts about the pet.
What helps children and families cope
When talking to children about a pet’s death, honesty and age-appropriate language are key.
“You should never lie to your child about the loss of their pet,” he said. “Answer their questions in an honest way that matches their age and understanding.”
Families can also find comfort in memorializing a pet in ways that feel meaningful, especially for children. This can include creating a scrapbook, making a memory box, or simply sharing stories and favorite memories together.
Grief can come in sudden waves, and one helpful approach is behavioral activation. This means intentionally doing activities that have brought comfort or happiness in the past, even when motivation is low. Planning supportive activities around triggers and spending time with trusted loved ones can help during the hardest moments. “If you know certain things will trigger grief, schedule supportive or enjoyable activities around those moments and spend time with people who care about you,” Dr. Blank said.
When to seek help
Grief does not come with a deadline. A key question to consider is whether grief symptoms are interfering with daily life.
“If symptoms related to grief are getting in the way of things you have to do, or even want to do, it is important to seek professional help,” he said.
Is it too soon to get another pet
There is not one right timeline. Dr. Blank encourages children and families to be thoughtful and compassionate with themselves as they decide what feels right.
“Getting a new pet can be hard after losing a previous one,” Dr. Blank said. “While it will not bring back the pet you lost, adopting from a rescue can be a meaningful way to give another animal a good life.”
Dr. Christopher Blank is available for interviews on why pet loss can be as painful as losing a loved one, why many people suffer in silence due to disenfranchised grief, what parents should say and avoid when a child’s pet dies, and how families can navigate euthanasia guilt, healthy memorials, and when to seek professional help. For interviews, contact Jordan Weinandt at jordan.weinandt@boystown.org or 531-355-1273.
About Boys Town
For over a century, Boys Town has been a beacon of hope, transforming the lives of America's children and families through innovative youth, research, and healthcare programs. Boys Town provides compassionate, research-proven education, prevention, training, and treatment for behavioral and physical problems in multiple locations throughout the United States, with a comprehensive array of resources and services. In 2024, more than 3.5 million children and families across the United States were impacted by Boys Town programs. You can find more information about Boys Town online at www.boystown.org.
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