In today’s nonstop digital world, where social media rewards instant reactions and harsh language, Boys Town is urging families to help children navigate online spaces with respect, empathy, and accountability.
“Kids are growing up in a world where reaction is rewarded and reflection is optional,” said Dr. Julie Almquist, Assistant Director of Boys Town Behavioral Health. “Our job as adults is to slow things down—teach kids how to express themselves respectfully, check facts, manage big feelings, and understand that posts leave a permanent footprint.”
Practical Tips for Parents to Use Tonight
1) Make a Family Social Media Plan. Set clear rules for what, when, and where your child can post (e.g., no posting after 9 p.m., no commenting on public threads, devices out of bedrooms, co-viewing news for younger kids).
2) Teach the “PAUSE” Test before posting. Ask these questions: Is it Personal—does this reveal too much? Is it Accurate? Is it Uplifting? Is it Safe? Is it Empathetic? If any answer is “no,” don’t post.
3) Model Tolerance and Respect. Disagree without disrespect. Use “I” statements, avoid name-calling, and show kids how to seek understanding from different viewpoints.
4) Explain Consequences of Online Comments. Walk through real examples: school discipline codes, athletic/activity eligibility, college admissions, scholarships, jobs, and legal implications. Remind kids that screenshots live forever—even deleted posts.
5) Build “Desensitization Awareness.” Talk about how repeated exposure to graphic content or harsh commentary can numb empathy. Encourage kids to mute, block, or report harmful accounts and to take screen breaks.
6) Practice Replacement Skills for Heated Moments. Suggest they draft a response on paper or in their Notes app. You might also encourage them to take a 10-minute cool-off period before replying, sleep on it, or ask a trusted adult to review.
7) Monitor and Mentor. Know their platforms, privacy settings, friends/follows, and keep an eye on their DMs. For younger users, require shared passwords; for teens, hold regular “show-and-tell” check-ins - not surprise “gotchas.”
8) Be an Upstander, not a Spectator. Coach kids to act safely, supportively, and without amplifying harm. Online pile-ons and “just watching” both fuel harm. Upstanders reduce damage by interrupting, supporting targets, and alerting adults—without escalating.
“Respect online is still respect,” said Dr. Almquist. “When we combine clear expectations, empathy, and accountability, kids learn to use their voice without harming others—or their own future.”
