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How can my spouse and I make sure we're on the same page when it comes to consistently giving our kids rewards and consequences?

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How can my spouse and I make sure we're on the same page when it comes to consistently giving our kids rewards and consequences?

Getting parents on the same page is very important because we want the rewards process to be as consistent as possible. We want to strive for “as consistent as possible,” because complete consistency and being on exactly the same page is impossible. However, we want to keep it as close as possible so the kids know exactly what’s going on. So they know that for negative behaviors, there's going to be a negative consequence, regardless of which parent they are with.

If there’s not consistency, then the kids may realize, “Well, you know, sometimes there’s a negative consequence that I don’t like, sometimes there’s not, but maybe I might be willing to risk it.” And same with the rewards, if it’s consistently happening they’re most likely going to respond really well and meet expectations from both mom and dad. Instead of one parent is on board and the other isn’t, then a lot of times we’ll see kids responding really well to mom and not so much to dad, or vice versa.

So, the parents being on the same page, and as consistent as possible, is crucial to really implementing any of these strategies to modify behavior.

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