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Modeling Adult Behavior During a Divorce


I have a 5-year-old daughter and a 2-year-old son. My wife and I are divorced, and we are consulting a mediator regarding child visitation rights. We have not arrived at a decision yet. I don’t know how to tell my daughter the reason for my inability to see her outside her mother’s home. She keeps asking me to take her places, but until we reach an agreement I cannot do this. Should I tell her the truth, that we are waiting for a decision from the court?


We think it is important to be honest with children, but their age and situation largely determine how much truth they can handle. In this situation, it is OK to tell her that Mommy and Daddy are trying to agree on what will be best for her and her brother. Focus on the positive by suggesting all of the fun activities you can do at home.

It is important to make this transition as smooth as possible. There should not be any arguments or blaming in front of the children. They need to see you both handle the situation like adults because you are teaching them with every decision you make.

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